David Ibieyomie: A grifter and his blasphemy, by Bamidele Johnson
I’d have collapsed in disbelief if this grifter had walked back on his ludicrous claim that Jesus hates the poor. He’s too high on his own supply to admit he was wrong. Pulpit grifters hardly walk back. You can count those who have on the fingers of a blind lathe operator’s hand.
This chap is a mentee of Oyedepo, who thinks he’s right even when wrong. He is given to avant garde interpretations of the Bible that suggest he sees the what the Bible says as merely a framework from which he is free to make creative decisions and really challenge the inflexible and tired idea of what the Gospel is. Just check his fat lie on Job and tithing. At 70, he hasn’t walked back.
It was no surprise Ibieyomie is doubling down. He once threatened to throttle Daddy Freeze to death over Oyedepo. In the current instance, he said while having his bath, God told him he was right to lie “on top” Jesus head that He hates the poor. I’m persuaded his own Jesus and that of Oyedepo must be avaricious, discriminatory and a diddler. It is their Jesus that Suleman also worships.
Well, let’s no kid ourselves that most have a Jesus that is different from that of the men I mentioned. Selman doesn’t have. It is reasonable to say, I believe, that the Jesus of Adeboye is of the same hue. The humble arrogance that gets him to, in that grandfatherly drawl, present himself as a Marvel comic hero that saves cities and civilizations deflects attention from the insidious things he says. Last year, lying to himself that he was walking back on the tosh he’d vended for decades, he said he was wrong to have claimed that non-tithers would go to hell.
In a classic swindler’s move, he went on to say God, with whom he famously drank tea, now wants from 20 per cent and above of Christians’ income as tithe, something the Bible does not say. Thete is actually no room for tithing in Christianity. Zero room. He, Oyedepo, Suleman, Ibieyomie and their ilk, I believe, will one day write their own Bible. They find the current one as grossly inadequate as Andre Onana. Jesus of the Bible doesn’t have enough steeze for them. The Jesus of their Bible will be born at some highbrow hospital like Duchess or Reddington and will have three wise men take disposable diapers, onesies and a sterilising unit to his mom, who will have multiple piercings and a tattooed body.
Even their baby Jesus will be born dreadlocked like the chap pastoring a church at Ilupeju.
The three wise men may ask their friend to tag along and bring with him “ajogba”. I don’t know what that’s called in English. But I know that these chaps are nobbling followers’ money and making the faith look cartoonish. I do think they don’t believe in God or afterlife. If they did, they’d not be lying like they do, especially those in their 70s and 80s, who are much closer to exiting this plane. They don’t effing believe in no God beyond Him being a commodity. Ndi gbaju e
