Our greatest regrets as sex workers – Nigerian girls speak on sordid past

By Deborah Oladejo, Osogbo

In the shadows of society, thousands of women are trapped in the vicious cycle of commercial sex work, living lives, marked by exploitation, abuse, and desperation. But amidst the darkness, there are glimmers of hope. Meet two women who escaped the clutches of prostitution, thanks to the transformative work of the Blossom Girls Outreach Foundation, an NGO based in Ile-Ife, Osun State. Here, they found hope, rehabilitation, and empowerment. In this piece, the girls narrate their journey in and out of prostitution. Their real identities are hidden for protection…

Purple Girl 1
“I am 30 years old. It started when I was learning a skill; my money got finished, so I had to ask a friend for help. I told her that I needed small money to continue with the skill that I was learning and that I was hungry. She told me I should come over to where she is because she has a job for me and that the only way she can help is for me to come to her base so that within one or two months I can make the money that I needed and go back to do my skill. I told her I don’t have transport fare; she sent money for my transport. I was thinking in my mind that she doesn’t have money to give me food, but she sent a transport fare. I was hesitant; but I embarked on the journey. I asked her what kind of work she has for me; she said it is restaurant work.

“When I was in the vehicle going on the journey, there was a man in the vehicle that asked where I was going, and I told him I’m going to Ogbomoso. He asked what I’m going there for, and he told me that they would lure me into prostitution. I told the man, God forbid, that I know my friend, that we met in Lagos, we worked together and that she is holy. So he said we should exchange numbers in case of any necessity. I said I would prove him wrong that my friend is not that kind of person.

“When I got there, she took me to her house, and I slept over. Then, on the following morning, she took me to the bar where she works. I saw ladies dressed naked and the way they were behaving. I asked what was going on, but she calmed me down. I tried to check; I saw where they were selling food and drinks, but when I saw those girls dressing naked because I myself I am a Christian, although I don’t know God very well, but my family worships God, I didn’t expect that I’m going to that kind of place. Later she said I should come, and she paid for a room, told me that anybody that comes in, she showed me a condom that I should use. I questioned her about what I should use the condom for, that she told me that there’s work for me. She then told the owner of the place not to allow me to leave the place until I refunded the money she gave me; there was no way for me to go out. Some other girls also came in and convinced me that I could do it. I thought within me that even if I run away, where am I going, even if I call the man I met in the vehicle, he will still sleep with me. So, I either do it and after paying the lady her money I will now go back. So I saw myself doing it. After paying her, I made small money and I travelled back.

“I spent all the money I made and still found myself returning to the brothel. Later on, I was not stable between one and five months because it was like something was drawing me back and out. I cannot explain it, but I myself feel that something is wrong somewhere, and the money, the way it comes, the way I spend it, I keep on doing it. My friend later introduced me to bringing in girls that will be working for me because I told her that my body could not do it again, that I don’t have strength for sex, and I told her I don’t know how to see girls. She then said she will be bringing girls for me, With that, I reduced the number of men I see daily as I made N100,000 on each girl I brought into the circle.

“One day when someone died, I thought that if one of my girls died, what would happen? Would the police not arrest me? So I released all the girls. Although police have been coming, the human trafficking agency has been coming to the brothel. So I settled the girls and told them to go.

“Later on I left the brothel, but something was still telling me to go to another brothel and continue my life. So I went. I didn’t stay up to a month before I met a lady who came to preach the word of God. We were many there; she was facing me and saying that God loves me so much that He wants me to leave prostitution. She asked me if I’m ready to go out of the brothel, and I said yes. I started going to church from the brothel; she said she would inform the church that I need financial assistance. We were about to tell the pastor when she came to tell me that she saw those that will help me on Instagram, and she asked me to connect, and I said if the place works, I will quit prostitution. She started chatting with where I am today. So the people she was chatting with asked me to pack my bags, and I told them I still have my belongings in Lagos, and I don’t have money to pack the ones in Kwara and Lagos, so they sent me transport to pack.

“So, I stayed in my house because those people that want to help me are still renovating their house, and that thought will come to me that, babe, you’re wasting your time, and are you sure they are going to call you? I’m hungry again. I told them I want cash, and they told me they would send me a stipend. My eyes were already on money, so when the stipend finished, I was on the way wanting to go back, to the brothel; it was as if God wanted to arrest me that particular day. The person that connected me called me and asked where I was, and I told her the truth that I’m on the way to Kwara State again. She now called the people when they would finish the renovation until the day it was finished, and I now went to them. All this story was for two years.

Regrets and advice:

“My biggest regret is bringing other girls into prostitution. I’m grateful none of them died. We are still communicating and some are now in a safe marriage. I also regret the physical and emotional abuse I suffered at the hands of men who treated me like a machine. My advice to those who love money is that there are better, cleaner ways to make a living. The money made through prostitution is fleeting, and the consequences can be devastating. I urge those still in the trade to quit and seek help. There is a way out, and I am living proof.

Purple Girl 2

“It all began after the loss of my dad, I lost him 2013. He is a type of person that knows God, so he carried me along.

“When he died, I backslided because of the type of friends I was keeping then and one of them lured me into the street.

“Although, being in that streets, I was stable. I had something I was doing actually, which was selling of shoes, handbags, clothes, and among others.

“So my friend led me to street because the money was not coming. She was like, this is what she’s also doing for a living, that I should stop thinking that she is only selling clothes that she do sell her body also.

“So actually, she borrowed me money to start up business but the business crashed. So in the process, I had to enter the streets by her advice to pay off the money that I borrowed from her.

“I borrowed from her N70,000 but I had to pay her N120,000 because she said the more delayed with the interest. So one day I had to quit when I started dating one particular guy. I don’t know that he’s a ritualist. The time that he wanted to use me as sacrifice was when I encounter the book called PURPLE.

“And that was the book that transformed my life from deity to beauty. So the life that I’m living now is a testimony.

“The first thing I knew was when I gave my life to Christ I have peace of mind.

“Secondly, divine favor from nowhere I saw different from darkness, kingdom of the light of God. So I could find the name of the Lord for making me to know who I am, for bringing the beauty that was planted in me, which the devil have hindered for many years.

Advise
“I’m also telling my fellow girls out there that there is no gain in prostitution. There’s no gain in using what you have to get what you want. There’s no gain because many are dying out there as I’m talking to you, one of my friends is mad for many years.

“Nobody knows where she came from, I don’t know her people including me, assuming that I know where she came from, I would have helped her to contact her people so they can give her adequate treatment to heal her from that madness.

“But there is nothing I can do. I wanted to be of help. I don’t know how to go about it, but she’s my friend and she’s mad now.

“Some other girls have died. I have two other girls, the one that came from Ghana was infected with HIV and died when she got back to her country.

“So anytime that you see a prostitute outside, what normally come out from their mouth, is that there’s no joy. And that is there slang “abeg leave me I no get joy”.

“So I can advise many girls that God’s time is the best. When you keep yourself a good husband will come. HIV is real, many will abort baby and in the process of aborting that child, they will not make it, they will die, ritualists will carry some and you’ll will not see them again. All you’ll see is that they are missing without knowing they have been used for money ritual.

“Some girls even go to seek “jazz,” so they can make money more than others and will not come back from that journey. Many will swallow many things in the name of they want to make it fast, without knowing their destiny.

“So I’m advising them, they should keep themselves according to how the Bible told us that our bodies are His temple and we should keep it holy, both men and women. Our body is the temple of God. We should keep it holy so the right man and the right woman will come in our life. So that is only what I have to say.

Regrets
“When I was raped by six men, that was the most critical time that I regretted the most.

“I just went to the place that I normally go to do the work, that was how I came across this organization.

“So when I got there was when I encounter the book called PURPLE GIRLS FOR MORE. When I read the book, the book transformed me, because the lady who wrote it added a prayer point there, that if you read this book, say this prayer after you say the prayer, give your life to Christ, call me.

“I reached out to Blossom Girls Outreach Foundation after reading the book; that was the beginning of my journey to salvation.”

“Right now, I haven’t learned skills, I’m doing business, but yes, I want to become a nurse, that is my dream, to become a midwife.

Also narrating her story, another lady, referred to as ‘Dubai girl’, who is in her late 20s, explained that she was a product of a disfunctional home.

“I grew up in a broken home and I survived on my own from my teenage years. I was involved in casual sex for survival but not on a commercial level. When I ventured into business in my early 20s, my father convinced me to go and work in Dubai, United Arab Emirates.

“But when I got there, I was forced into prostitution for about two years. On several occasions, I was arrested by the police and it took several interventions that I was not deported on those occasions. But eventually, I was deported; I was not allowed to go with any of my property, which I acquired in the course of the job.

“When I returned to Nigeria, I relocated to Lekki, where I started professional prostitution and lived recklessly until I met someone who preached the gospel to me and introduced me to Blossom Girls Outreach Foundation.”