Fayose’s relentless commentary on Seyi Makinde — by Bamidele Johnson

If Nigerian politics had a streaming service, Ayo Fayose would already be deep into Season Six of his commentary on Seyi Makinde. No breaks. Just episode after episode. Relentless. Just relentless.

Nigerian politics thrives on voluble personalities and Fayose has never been interested in being a background character. He is a headline enthusiast and studio rat (apology to wharf rats). These days, he issues more statements than the State House and the recurring theme is Seyi Makinde.

Makinde met X. Makinde is planning Y. Makinde may be considering A. Makinde could be plotting B. If there is a handshake in Ibadan, a press statement is likely to follow.

To those of us outside the main arena of politics, it is grating. Why the constant surveillance? Why the need to interpret every meeting? But those who understand that relevance in politics is like oxygen that must be constantly inhaled will nod knowingly. Stop breathing and someone else occupies the space. From that angle, the persistence is strategic.

Still, one has to ask. Is Fayose the unofficial secretary at every meeting Makinde attends? Does he sit by the door, taking notes and distributing minutes to people who were not even invited. The confidence with which he narrates intentions suggests access to conversations that have not yet finished happening.

At this rate, it feels like we are one statement away from a policy analysis of Makinde’s bathing habits. A communique on the colour of his pants. A briefing on whether he wears Hings singlet. A position paper on armpit density and perhaps a clarification on whether he prefers chewing stick to Colgate. Nothing would shock anymore.

We cannot ignore the fact that it is Wike speaking through Fayose.
The commitment is fierce. Some hardened ideological movements have shown less single-minded focus in defending territory than Fayose displays in defending the Wike-inspired narrative. Safe bet he’s being well sugared by Nyesom, whose name is a near-anagram of money. Make of that what you will.

But that is politics. Visibility is survival. Volume is leverage. And Fayose understands both. So the episodes continue, the statements multiply and Makinde remains the central character in a series he did not exactly produce.